Quotes
Frankenstein's Monster: Let me go!
Carl: Where are you going to go? I don't know if you've looked in the mirror
lately, but you kind of stick out in a crowd.
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Count Vladislaus Dracula: Igor... Do unto others...
Igor: Before they do it unto me!
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Top Hat: I see the Wolfman hasn't killed you yet.
Van Helsing: Don't worry. He's getting to it.
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Carl: Why does it smell like wet dog in here?
Van Helsing: Werewolf.
Carl: Oh, yes. You'll be needing silver bullets.
[throws canister of bullets to Van Helsing rather deftly]
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Anna Valerious: He's the first one to kill a vampire in over a hundred years.
I'd say that's earned him a drink.
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Anna Valerious: I think if you're going to kill someone, kill them, don't stand
there talking about it!
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Carl: You're supposed to die!
Frankenstein's Monster: I want to live!
Carl: ...Alright.
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Anna Valerious: Some say you're a murderer. Others say you're a holy man. Which
is it?
Van Helsing: It's a bit of both, I think.
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Count Vladislaus Dracula: [As Igor is poking a werewolf with a cattle prod]
Why do you pester them so?
Igor: That's what I do
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Van Helsing: And you're coming with me.
Carl: Hell, no. Damn, I'm not.
Van Helsing: Carl, you're cursing. Badly, but still cursing. Monks can't do
that.
Carl: Actually, I'm a friar. I can do whatever I want. Dammit.
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Carl: Is this how it normally goes?
Van Helsing: Pretty much.
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Van Helsing: You're a genius!
Carl: A genius with access to unstable chemicals!
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Igor: Please, don't kill me!
Van Helsing: Why not?
Igor: Well, uh...
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Van Helsing: [upon seeing a Gatling gun] Why can't I have one of those?
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Van Helsing: Bless me father for I have...
Cardinal Jinette: Sinned! I know! I know, you very good at that. You crashed
through a window at Notre Dame!
Van Helsing: Not to split hairs, but it was Mr. Hyde who was actually did the
crashing.
Cardinal Jinette: Thirteenth century. Over six hundred years old! I wish you
a week in hell for that.
Van Helsing: It would be a nice reprieve.
Cardinal Jinette: Don't get me wrong. Your results are unquestionable, but you
draw far too attention to yourself. You were to keep a low profile and what
happens? Wanted posters! Your face and name spread all over the city.
Van Helsing: Do you think like being the most wanted man in Europe? Why don't
you and the order do something about?
Cardinal Jinette: Because we do not exist.
Van Helsing: Then neither do I.
Cardinal Jinette: When we found you crawling up the steps of this very church,
Half dead, it was clear to us that you had been sent to do God's work.
Van Helsing: Why can't God do it himself?
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Van Helsing: My life... my job... my curse... is to vanquish evil.
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Van Helsing: This thing... man... whatever it is... evil may have created it,
left its mark on it... but evil does not rule it. So I cannot kill it.
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Carl: [after saving the woman from the vampire children] They've all died.
Barmaid: Oh thank you! You saved me
[kisses him on the cheek]
Barmaid: How can I repay you?
[Carl leans in and whispers something in her ear]
Barmaid: But you are a monk. Can you do that?
Carl: Actually, I'm a friar.
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Carl: Are you always this popular?
Van Helsing: Pretty much.
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Velkan: I'd rather die than help you!
Count Vladislaus Dracula: Oh, don't be boring. Everyone who says that dies.
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Anna Valerious: No one knows how to kill Dracula.
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Van Helsing: There's something down here, it's carnivorous. Whatever it is it
appears to be... human. I'd say it's a size 17, about 360 pounds, 8 and a half
to 9 feet tall and he has a bad gimp in his right leg and, ah, 3 copper teeth.
Anna Valerious: How do you know he has copper teeth?
Van Helsing: 'Cause he's standing right behind you.
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Van Helsing: Vampires, gargoyles, warlocks, they're all the same - best when
cooked well.
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Carl: I'm not a field man! Van Helsing, I don't want to go to Transylvania!
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Van Helsing: You are a monk. You can not swear.
Carl: I am but a Friar. Damn it.
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Carl: She's dead...
Van Helsing: Aroooooooooooo!
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Aleera: I want first bite!
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Van Helsing: To have memories of those you have loved and lost is perhaps harder
than to have no memories at all.
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Van Helsing: He's not your brother anymore, Anna!
Anna Valerious: You knew?
Van Helsing: Yes.
Anna Valerious: Before or after I stopped you from shooting him?
Van Helsing: Before.
Anna Valerious: And you still tried to kill him?
Van Helsing: He's a werewolf. He's going to kill people.
Anna Valerious: It's not his fault! He can't help it!
Van Helsing: I know, but he's going to do it anyway!
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Count Vladislaus Dracula: You can't kill me, Doctor.
[Dracula pushes himself onto the sword Dr. Frankenstein is wielding]
Count Vladislaus Dracula: I'm already dead.
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Anna Valerious: [after Van Helsing has killed the Werewolf] You killed him!
Van Helsing: Now you see why people call me a murderer.
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Frankenstein's Monster: Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I shall fear no evil. I *will* have my vengeance!
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Anna Valerious: You make my skin crawl.
Count Vladislaus Dracula: That's not all I could do with it.
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Van Helsing: I remember fighting the Romans at Masada.
Carl: That was in 75 A.D.!
Van Helsing: You asked.
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Van Helsing: You will take Anna and Carl to the tower and find the cure.
Igor: No... I... will... not...
[Van Helsing grabs Igor and throws him violently onto rock]
Igor: Yes... I... will...
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Marishka: Too bad, so sad.
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Van Helsing: This may hurt a little.
Frankenstein's Monster: I am accustomed to pain.
Van Helsing: Lets us know we're alive.
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Van Helsing: I missed you in London.
Mr. Hyde: No, you bloody did not. You got me good.
[shows Van Helsing a bullet wound]
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Top Hat: You killed a vampire.
Van Helsing: I thought that was a good thing.
Top Hat: Vampires only kill what they need to survive. Now they will kill for
revenge.
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Villager: He killed a vampire!
Carl: Isn't that a good thing?
Top Hat: The Vampires only take what they need to survive. Maybe two or three
a month... but now they will kill for revenge!
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Carl: VAMPIRES!
[jumps up and then looks at the couch where the barmaid he had just made love
to is]
Carl: Now I remember.
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Count Vladislaus Dracula: [grinning to himself] Oh, Gabriel!
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Dr. Victor Frankenstein: [about the monster] I could never allow him to be used
for such evil!
Count Vladislaus Dracula: *I* could!
Source: IMDB
